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Power, Love and Self-discipline: A Look at 2 Timothy 1:7

Not So Dry, Actually

I attended a prayer retreat a few weeks ago (guys, it's not as spiritual as it sounds — it was for work). As the small group of us, 12 or so, sat together on the morning of the second day, the man leading us (Doc Leland, actually) asked us to describe the present state of our relationship with God.

Person after person, though they all used different words, expressed the same sentiment — that God felt distant. That things felt "dry."

When it came my turn, I had to play the party pooper. Oddly enough, I hadn't been feeling dry. I described that, while life had been frustrating at times, never over the past few months had God felt distant. I told everyone that, though I'd dealt with some hard stuff, I had sensed God's presence throughout each episode.

As I've thought back to that group share session, I've realized a lot of what God has been doing in my life — the reason He's felt so close as of late — centers around one particular passage of Scripture. That passage is 2 Timothy 1:7, which says, "For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline" (NIV).

About a year ago I was going through the New Testament in my little pocket-sized Bible, looking at the various passages I had boxed and underlined. When I got to 2 Timothy, this verse seemed to jump off the page. I knew those three — power, love and self-discipline — were traits God wanted me to work on. Or, rather, He wanted to work on them in me.

And work on me He has.

I also shared with everyone at the retreat why I felt God was teaching me all this stuff. But we'll get to that later. First, here are some quick thoughts on what He's been up to in my life.

Power

I don't speak Greek, but I can't help but think Timothy must have been struggling: Sure, he was called to spread the gospel, but Timothy was young and surrounded by a pantheistic culture. Paul reminds his mentee that God's will for him is not that he be timid, but instead that he be assertive, through the power of the Holy Spirit.

That's an exhortation I need sometimes.

I'm a pretty laid back kind of guy. Oftentimes I just assume it's OK for me to sit back and let things happen. God's convicted me that this kind of attitude just won't cut it.

I mean, what happens when I get into a relationship? I'm going to have to step up, so to speak, because I believe that, as a man, Christ calls me to be the spiritual leader of that relationship. As Jason Boyett points out in another Men's Hall article, "Marriage Prep 101 (Whether You've Met Her Yet or Not)," I need to be preparing for marriage now.

For me, that means learning not only how to lead, but understanding God wants me to.¹

Also in this "power" category: Not being one to command others' attention, I've been hesitant to want to lead a small-group Bible study. I tried it once, in college, and I just didn't feel all that effective. But I've had the chance to do it again recently in the men's small group I'm a member of, and it's been really great. My fellow Bible studiers have responded positively. Through their encouragement God has taught me not only that I ought to reach out to other young men, but also that I'm able.

And then there's the need to be assertive in dealing with conflict. Though I'm naturally pretty good at avoiding conflict, I've realized I simply can't — it's not an option. I've learned that conflict, or addressing it, rather, is actually a good thing. Meeting conflict head-on leads to healing and restoration, hopefully, and clarification of the problem, if nothing else. As weird as it sounds, it's actually a way to love people. Speaking of which …

Love

I'm not sure, before I really began pondering 2 Timothy 1:7, what I thought love was. Actually, I don't know that I'd thought deeply about it much at all. That's changed, for sure.

Probably the most significant thing I've learned, as cliché as it sounds, is that love is less about feelings — which come and go like the tides — and more about commitment to the good of another. And commitment is about sticking by someone's side through "the good, the bad, and the ugly." Commitment is about the long haul. Too often we want this business of loving others to be an easy affair.

I think, perhaps, that's why we see the sorts of stats we do in books like unChristian,² an indicting look at what non-Christians think of us, and consequently, what they think of our faith.

Loving people consistently over time is hard. When someone's being difficult or their life's in shambles, which will happen every now and again, is exactly when they need love most.

This topic, the difficulty of a commitment kind of love, is something we Christians need to talk more about. Doing so, I think, would better equip us to live the way Christ would have us live — more communally, more involved in others' lives.

I'm convinced that as we talk more about love-as-commitment, we'll be more equipped to experience its ultimate benefits: the transformation of lives.

Self-discipline

Of the three spirit-traits listed in the 2 Timothy passage, self-discipline is probably the least spiritual sounding, maybe because it has "self" in it. Nonetheless, it's something God wants us to work on. Because, as Henry Blackaby says, God is concerned not only with our spiritual parts, but all of who we are, including the physical, corporeal, seemingly unspiritual parts of us:

God is a very practical God. He was in Scripture. He is the same today. When He provided manna, quail, and water for the children of Israel, He was being practical. When Jesus fed five thousand, He was being practical. The God I see revealed in biblical times is real, personal, and practical. I just trust God to be practical and real to me too.³

God is the Creator of all life, so He knows how it is best lived. Obviously. So what sorts of self-discipline type thing does God have me working on now? Well, regularly spending time with Him, for one.

I don't know about you, men, but I do not do mornings, which means I don't get up early to do devotions or whatever you want to call them. But a few weeks ago I decided it was time I give the morning quiet time thing a try. It's been a big adjustment for this self-identified night owl, getting up at 6:26 a.m. every single weekday morning. I have to say, though, the comfort I feel from having started my day with God is worth going to bed a little earlier. It's worth planning ahead so I can give the first part of my day — my "first fruits,"⁵ as it were — to God.

What else have I learned about self-discipline? Hmm … Well, God's helped me continue to manage my money well. And He's also jabbing me every once in a while about how I talk — that sometimes I'm more negative than I ought to be, especially when I'm talking about other people. And there are lots of little things. Over all, I've learned that God really does want to help me achieve self-discipline. Second Timothy 1:7 says so. As I submit un-disciplined areas of my life to God's control, it starts to happen.

Exporting Power, Love and Self-discipline

Like I said, it's been a year since I started concentrating on this passage. Thankfully, God has given me opportunities to on work power, love and self-discipline. Sometimes it's been great; some of the time it's been hard. Really hard, actually. But it's always been good — that deep kind of good where you know God is working on you and you wouldn't have it any other way.

Going back to that prayer retreat I mentioned earlier, I ended my turn at share time by saying I was feeling God pushing me to take what He'd taught me and live more "outwardly," that is, to be less focused on fixing what's wrong with me (goodness knows I could be accused of spiritual navel-gazing) and more involved in others' lives.

That, I believe, is the reason God has made Himself so present to me.

So, guys, what has God been teaching you lately? I encourage you to ponder that question. If things seem a little dry right now — or a lot dry — just continue seeking Him. As Jeremiah 29:13 says, "You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart."

C O F F E E  S H O P

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What has God been teaching lately?

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And remember: When you find Him, it's your job — your privilege, really — to bring others along with you on the journey. Once you've experienced intimacy with God, you can't keep it to yourself.